Anna and I ride up and over the undulating landscape of Vermont’s North East Kingdom. A remote part of one of the least populated states in the nation, the NEK (as the oval bumper stickers say) is thick with woods that embrace the mountains and crowd right up to the edge of the beautiful lakes up here. It’s been a helluva trip so far, and I’m enjoying the asphalt waltz. But on this golden late afternoon summer, when the shadows start to lengthen and the airs starts to cool, my mental radar is on high alert for deer and moose.
I’ve ridden through woods like this before - thousands of miles in New England, up and over the Northern California coastal range, in Spain and Patagonia, thousands of miles near and far. But on this day, my throttle hand is tempered by imagined shadows flitting in my peripheral vision, to the point where the dance turns into a dirge; let’s just get around this bend safe, let’s just get through this swampy area safe, let’s just get to the campground safe.
What is happening to me?
There was a time, not that long ago, when I filled my life with apexes. I’d charge into corner after corner with verve, testing my skills and reflexes and guts. That feeling of scrubbing speed, searching for the late apex, twisting the throttle as the corner opens up and the RPMs rise, and the feeling the rear tire struggle for traction as the road straightens….chef’s kiss.
Those times still happen - 2022 Lolo Pass, 2021 Utah Motorsports Campus, 2020 in New Hampshire, and just a few hours ago, actually, as we wound our way through the Green Mountains.
But last Spring, I flew over the trunk of a Dodge, it’s driver blissfully unaware that her errant left turn was sending me into low earth orbit. Last Fall, I came upon the scene of a deer strike at the National Rally in Canaan Valley, West Virginia seconds after it happened and then spent the better part of the next week touring the state and looking for the second deer. And a couple of months ago, I heard the hooves of a young fawn clatter on the asphalt in front of me as they scampered from one side of the road to another.
These incidents aren’t new. Years ago, I nearly rode into the business end of a moose in Maine. I’ve lowsided and highsided at the track. I’ve seen the inside of ambulances more times than I care to recall. It’s how I’m responding to these moments that’s changed.
For years, I've watched friends and acquaintances reach the end of their own motorcycle roads. The declining health that accompanies aging was the most common culprit. So I’ve girded my body with a better diet and better fitness, hoping to stave off my physical decline as long as possible. Bicycle rides, planks, wall sits, etc. I’ve even tried learning how to ride a unicycle. As a result, I’m in the best shape of my last 10 years. But this change is happening in my mind, not in my body. I did not expect that.
Little did I know when I started riding over 25 years ago that motorcycling would become such a large part of my life. The places I’ve been, the friends that I’ve made, the stories I have heard and told, the photos I have taken. It’s been one of the longest chapters of my life. But every chapter and every good book eventually comes to an end. This chapter isn’t over, but I can start to imagine a point in my life when it is.
It’s like there’s a small dot in my mirrors. The mirrors shake a bit so it’s kind of hard to discern. It wasn’t there a couple of years ago but it’s there now and I’m not quite sure if it’s getting bigger or smaller. That dot is the end of my riding days. Sometimes I can feel it over my shoulder. Sometimes I can’t see it at all. I don’t think I can outrun it but it doesn’t feel like an immediate threat. So I’ll just continue to ride and continue to check my mirrors from time to time. And enjoy whatever time I have left.
“The idea is to die young as late as possible” - Ashley Montagu
Originally published in the Sept-Oct 2024 issue of “On The Level,” the magazine of the BMW Riders Association. It’s a great club magazine, and I’m not saying that because I was the former Editor-in-Chief. Good friend Chris Parker is now at the helm. If you’re a BMW owner and like BMW content, check it out.
